Farm Struggles
by Kiheada.Ray.T
Summary: Prequel to Family Struggles. RoranxEragon. Tells the story of how the two evolved in their relationship prior to Family Struggles, to give a background for said fic. Enjoy!  rated M for a reason, little kiddies beware. Complete!
1. Chapter 1: Humble Beginnings

**Farm Struggles**

**Chapter 1: Humble Beginnings**

**Disclaimer:** So I don't own anything except the fictitious –plot- to this particular fanfiction. Except any OCs hiding around. I will state now that the characters will be a bit OOC.

**WARNING:**** There is boyxboy action in this fic, meaning some smut (sex). It is rated mature for a reason. There are mentions of incest and homosexuality, so if you are offended by either of these, I suggest you quit reading. I will accept no flames about this. Read at your own discretion.**

_Yes, this is a prequel to Family Struggles. I don't know how many chappies it will have, but it WILL be short! This is simply the EragonxRoran part when they lived on Garrow's farm before their worlds were turned upside down. Little children….back away slowly…..RUN FOR YOUR LIVES OR THEY'LL EAT YOU!_

* * *

"Happy birthday Eragon!"

"Ah!" Eragon exclaimed and jumped out of his bed when he heard the loud yelling. He looked around and glared at his cousin for waking him.

Roran laughed. "A little jumpy? What did you expect, a flock of women to rush to your side since you are now a man?" he asked.

Eragon scowled. "No, but I didn't expect my cousin to start yelling in my ear!"

"I wasn't yelling. Besides, aren't you excited? You are now sixteen, a man! I cannot make jokes at you being a little boy anymore. Although, you haven't looked like a little boy for some years now." Roran replied, giving Eragon a bold once-over.

Eragon flushed red. "H-Hey!"

Roran laughed raucously at Eragon's embarrassed expression. The younger of the two glared at him again and then smirked, thinking of a comeback.

"Well maybe it isn't the women I should be worried about, _cousin_."

That stopped Roran short, who looked at Eragon with such seriousness and intensity that the boy (excuse me, _man_) gulped in fear.

"Is that right, cousin? Are you worried about me sneaking into your bed at night and ravaging the boyhood out of you?" he asked huskily as he stepped closer to Eragon. His eyes were dark and probing, staring into Eragon's like he was something to eat.

"C-cut it out! I was only joking." Eragon said and tried to take a step back, stumbling over a chair in the process.

Roran tackled him and they wrestled until the older man had him pinned to the floor, giving him that same look.

"Roran! Quit! You're making me uncomfortable!" Eragon exclaimed, trying to throw his cousin off.

"Oh come on Eragon. You know I only have eyes for Katrina. I just like messing with you, that's all." Roran told him and helped him up.

Eragon's cheeks were still red but he nodded and followed his cousin into the kitchen where Garrow was fixing breakfast.

After breakfast the two men went to work in the fields as usual. Today, however, they would stop early to take Eragon into town and celebrate. There wasn't much to do, but they would sit in the tavern and have a few drinks and talk about when he was younger, as they normally would on his birthday. For some reason, Eragon figured there was more in store for him since this birthday was unique, marking him as a man in human terms. The farmers weren't rich, but they could still give valuable gifts and their family life was rich in itself.

The three men were very close, because all they had was each other. Eragon's parents were missing, while his father was unknown. His uncle and cousin were the only family he had, since his aunt died some years ago. Roran was a few years older than Eragon, so soon he would leave, maybe not Carvahall, but at least the farm house where they all lived. Roran would find a wife and settle down with her, and Eragon wouldn't see him as much, and their roughhousing would end.

Eragon eyed his cousin who was shirtless because of the heat as he worked the field. The joking from earlier was normal for them, but it wasn't normal for two male cousins. When Eragon hit puberty, he relied mostly on Roran because he was older and they were as brothers. Garrow tried to help, but he felt more comfortable with Roran. Soon the two developed an interesting relationship. There weren't many people in Carvahall, so their future mates were limited and any normal teenage fooling around was hard when there were only a few males and females to go around.

In Carvahall, the teenagers were held at bay and not allowed to be alone with each other, because unexpected pregnancies would not be tolerated. Because of this, there was a lot of sexual tension, especially with Roran. They had no female influence except the women in town, who were regarded as friends and acquaintances but never sex-buddies. Roran was older than Eragon and puberty was hard for him since Garrow was a solitary man and didn't like to discuss things of that nature. He was mature and responsible enough not to run off with any of the other girls, but even if he wasn't, no girl would allow him to do anything he wanted.

His young cousin didn't yet understand, and they would often play-fight and joke around, which became awkward for Roran after a certain point. But then Eragon hit puberty and began to understand the ways of the world in regards to hormones and sexuality.

So one day they faced each other and made a pact; I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine- but they weren't referring to each other's backs so much as their backsides. There was an attraction that was very uncommon but almost a relief to the two, and they began experimenting with each other. It was perfect because neither of them could get knocked up and no one would know, because they kept the relationship a secret from even Garrow.

However, Roran became interested in Katrina, but had yet to make a move. Now that Eragon had become a man, he wasn't sure if he and Roran would take their relationship further or end it.

"Is something wrong, Eragon?" Roran asked and Eragon snapped out of his thoughts.

"No, I was just thinking about finally being a man." The younger lied.

Roran smirked. "No you weren't, you were checking me out. I have a nice tan this year, and I swear my muscles are much larger than ever before. I seem to be filling out quite nicely huh?"

Eragon stumbled and tried to come up with a response, unable to stop his blush.

"You're filling out quite nicely too, I've noticed. Let me see your muscles." Roran added and put down his tool to saunter over to Eragon.

"We should be working; we won't have a full day's work already since we'll be going to town later on." Eragon replied, looking at his cousin warily.

"Oh relax; we'll get some work done. I figure it's your birthday and a very important one at that so you shouldn't have to work too hard." Roran replied and stopped in front of him. He took Eragon's rake and set it down despite Eragon's noises of displeasure. He grabbed his arm and slid his hand up to his bicep. "Very nice, you've been working hard this year. They're not as big as mine though." He said and flexed his muscles. "Go on, feel."

"No thanks, I already know your muscles are bigger." Eragon answered casually and then blushed. "I didn't mean…your arm muscles…not your…yeah…." He stuttered.

Roran smirked. "That's bigger too, cousin. We made that clear the other night. Don't worry, you'll fill out more soon." He said and slapped him on the back.

"Okay well, let's just get back to work." Eragon said and bent to pick his rake back up, hiding his face.

"Why are you blushing? You're old enough to be mature, there should be no blushing. Do I blush? Quit acting like a child or I'll have to treat you like a child." Roran replied, although Eragon couldn't tell whether he was being serious or playful.

"Um, what do you mean? How will you treat me like a child?" Eragon replied curiously, ignoring the blushing comments.

"By draping you over my knee and spanking you of course. Actually, I do believe you're due for sixteen spankings anyway, birthday boy." Roran leered.

"I think that tradition ended last year since I'm not a boy anymore." Eragon said but started backing away from his cousin.

"Oh no, it ends this year since you are now a man. Come on Eragon, you're only delaying the inevitable. You're tried avoiding me before, and you know it never works." Roran smirked as he advanced upon Eragon.

"No way! Your spanks hurt! Besides, I refuse to be treated like a child because I am no longer one."

"You act like one."

"Do not!"

"Ha! There you go again! Come here!" Roran yelled and broke out into a sprint.

Eragon shrieked and bolted away, trying to avoid Roran's lunges by crisscrossing within the field. Roran, however, was much faster and finally tackled him to the ground.

"Alright, over my knee. Don't worry Eragon I'll go easy on you." He said as they wrestled.

"No way! Let go!" Eragon exclaimed and tried to get free.

Roran finally got Eragon into position and lifted his hand.

"Don't you dare!" Eragon yelled and struggled more.

_Slap!_

"YEOW!"

"One birthday spank." Roran said with a grin and raised his hand again.

_Slap!_

"OUCH! RORAN!"

"Two birthday spanks. Oh come on Eragon you're such a baby, there's still fourteen more to go!"

_Slap!_

"OW! I'LL GET YOU BACK FOR THIS!"

"Three birthday spanks. You won't do anything Eragon except to avoid sitting down for a while." He replied and laughed.

_Slap!_

"GARROW'S GONNA WONDER WHY WE'RE NOT DOING ANYTHING!"

"Four birthday spanks. You're right, if you keep squealing he'll hear us, so shut up and take it like a man!"

_Slap!_

"EEEK! I'M NOT SQUEALING!"

"Five birthday spanks. I swear your voice just jumped up in pitch, didn't you already go through puberty?"

_Slap!_

"YOU'RE HITTING ME! OF COURSE MY VOICE IS GOING UP IN PITCH! YOU'RE A LOUSY COUSIN YOU KNOW THAT?"

"Six birthday spanks. Ten more to go, Eragon. And I'm not a lousy cousin, I take care of _all_ your needs if you care to remember."

_Slap!_

"…"

Roran only laughed at Eragon's crimson face and raised his hand again.

_Slap!_

"Okay seriously that's enough!"

"That was only eight! Now for eight more."

_Slap!_

Eragon groaned and started to struggle again.

"You do realize if I don't get the rest in now I'll get them in later, and you won't be able to scream like a girl with Garrow in the house."

"I do not scream like a girl!" Eragon exclaimed.

_Slap!_

"AHHHHH!"

"That sure sounded like a girl to me."

Eragon mumbled something incoherently then let out a yelp as Roran spanked him again. He gritted his teeth and ignored his cousin's racy comments as he continued to be spanked.

_Slap!_

"And sixteen birthday spanks. There, that wasn't so bad now was it?" Roran asked and laughed.

"I hate you." Eragon growled as he tried to maneuver out of his cousin's lap. Roran pushed him over and laughed harder as he landed on his back and started writhing around in pain. "JERK!" he shouted.

"Oh come on, you know you liked it."Roran said.

"Not really, and you better not do that again, ever!" Eragon replied.

"Oh alright. Besides, I have a special surprise for you tonight." His cousin told him.

Eragon raised an eyebrow. "What surprise?" he asked, eyeing his cousin suspiciously.

"You'll see." Roran replied and winked.

"What? No, tell me your evil scheme!"

"Nope, you'll have to wait and see!"

"Roran! You know I don't like surprises! Especially from you!" Eragon called as Roran walked back to where he dropped his tools.

The older cousin ignored him and started whistling as he got back to work.

Eragon started grumbling about conniving cousins as he also went to retrieve his tools and got back to work.

When it was time to stop they headed back to the farmhouse, Eragon eyeing his cousin warily as Roran walked casually. They put up their tools and then went inside to wash up before heading out with Garrow to the town.

They went inside the tavern and up to the bar. Roran patted the seat next to him and looked to Eragon. "Have a seat, cousin." He said with a smirk.

Eragon glared at him. "Nah, I'd rather stand." He replied.

"You've been standing all day out in the fields, take a rest and sit down." Garrow said.

Roran continued to smirk as Eragon eased himself down onto the hard wooden stool, trying not to wince.

"Ah, Roran gave you birthday spankings. I was wondering what all that screaming was about earlier." Garrow mumbled.

Eragon had just taken a sip from his drink and started coughing as Roran burst into laughter.

"Well I told him to quit squealing or you'd hear. Maybe he needs a few more years to continue maturing." Roran teased.

"No, he's a man now, whether he's ready or not." Garrow replied and gave Eragon a knowing look. "And this will be the last birthday to give spankings, Roran, or else you'll start a scandal." He whispered to his son.

Roran's expression turned serious. "Yes father, I was only joking."

Eragon shot him a smug look while Garrow wasn't looking, to which Roran returned it with a glare.

After a while they started talking of Eragon's childhood as many members of the town came up to congratulate him and wish him a happy birthday. They drank much ale and had much fun until it got late and they had to return home. Tomorrow was another day, and work needed to be done.

They exchanged gifts when they returned home, Garrow giving him a new pack for when he went hunting, and Roran giving him some money to spend for when the travelers came with their goods. Garrow resigned to bed soon afterwards.

"Well, it's certainly been an interesting day. Good night, Roran." Eragon said as he headed to his room, forgetting about Roran's "surprise".

"Hold on, don't you remember earlier?" Roran asked and caught him by the arm.

"My birthday spankings? You better not give me any more." Eragon said and tried to pull away.

Roran chuckled. "No silly, I meant my surprise." He said. There was a strange look in his eyes that Eragon had rarely seen before and couldn't figure out what it meant.

"Oh yeah." Eragon said and narrowed his eyes.

Roran flashed him a grin and lead him to his room. "It's in here." He said.

Eragon grew even more wary as Roran shut the door behind them. He turned and gave Eragon a look that he knew well.

"Oh." He breathed.

Roran tugged him closer and kissed him, cupping his cheek. Eragon returned the gesture and then felt himself being lead to the bed. They lay down and Roran moved his hands to Eragon's shirt.

"Wait, what's the surprise?" Eragon whispered as his shirt came off.

"Be patient and you'll find out." Roran replied and nibbled his neck. His hands moved to Eragon's pants as he pulled off Roran's shirt. Then Roran's pants came off.

Eragon gave him a questioning look as he felt Roran's hands slid down his chest and around his member. His eyes widened as those same hands curved around to his butt.

Now he understood what the surprise was. While they had experimented before, they had never taken it this far. Eragon assumed that Roran was waiting for him to reach manhood before they took that next crucial step.

"Remember, no screaming." Roran said with a wicked grin as Eragon blushed. A small smile started to spread across his face, and he kissed Roran again with more passion than before.

It turned out to be a great birthday after all.

* * *

**-Author's Note: The long-awaited prequel (at least one of them anyway) to Family Struggles is here! This is Roran and Eragon's story, and will be short but sweet. As I stated in the warning, I will not accept flames, but questions, comments, ideas, etc. are welcome. Please review and tell me what you think! Oh and before I go…SURPRISE BUTT SECKS! Had to get that out, sorry. Peace!-**


	2. Chapter 2: Forbidden

**Chapter 2: Forbidden**

**Disclaimer:** **I do not own any of the characters unless they are OCs, as in not part of Chrissy P's characters. If I randomly burst into song (which probably won't happen in this but who knows right?) I also do not own that. What I do own…is insanity. Please enjoy.**

**WARNING:**** There is boyxboy action in this fic, meaning some smut (sex). It is rated mature for a reason. There are mentions of incest and homosexuality, so if you are offended by either of these, I suggest you quit reading. I will accept no flames about this. Read at your own discretion.**

**

* * *

**

Roran stirred awake as the sun spilt in through the window of Eragon's room.

Wait a moment, how did he…?

'_Oh yeah, his birthday present last night. It's a good thing I woke up this early, maybe Garrow won't notice.' _He thought.

He was about to sit up when he saw how peaceful Eragon looked, sleeping soundly beside him. He had his arms around the boy- or should I say man- when he opened his eyes. He almost didn't want to let go, but he knew that if he stayed a moment longer it could spell trouble.

He thought about what it would be like if he and Eragon could stay together like this, forever. If they could just be with each other always and not have to worry about what the villagers would think, or Garrow. But alas, this was not to be, besides, he was hoping Katrina would be the one he settled down with.

He would never admit it, but he loved his cousin. It was not a family kind of love, or an agape, friendship love. It was romance, it was passion, it was fire. It burned within him, but he could not let it consume him. He also couldn't let Eragon know.

As far as they were both concerned, this was just experimentation. Jokes and relief from hormones. Nothing else, no other feelings except lust. If the younger knew how Roran really felt, what would he say? Would he break it off? Would he be disgusted?

He doubted Eragon would be so adverse, but still, he couldn't help but feel that the younger would be wary of him even more if he knew his true feelings. Plus he didn't want to make things awkward; they were already awkward at times.

Roran sighed and touched his cousin's face gently, he smiled as he caressed his cheek and moved his fingers along Eragon's curves.

'_Wait, what am I doing? I need to leave before Garrow gets up!'_ he thought and quickly got out of the bed. He pulled on his clothes and then tiptoed out of the room, glancing around for signs of his father. When the coast was clear he quietly went down the hall to his own room.

He heard movement in the kitchen and froze. Garrow was already up. Did he notice that Roran was not in his room? Did he look into Eragon's room this morning and see the two sleeping together?

Roran's heartbeat accelerated intensely as he wondered whether they had been caught. He tried to get into his room quickly and quietly, and then began to wash up, trying to erase the scent of his cousin off his skin. When he was in fresh clothes and was sure he smelled only of himself, he entered the kitchen for breakfast.

"Good morning, son." Garrow said gruffly. It sounded normal enough.

"Good morning father." Roran replied as he usually did.

"We'll need to work overtime in the fields today, so don't wait up for Eragon. I want you out working as soon as you finish breakfast. If he sleeps in late I'll have to wake him and join the two of you." The man said.

Roran nodded. It didn't look like Garrow was suspicious or knew anything. Then again, his father was good at hiding his true emotions.

After breakfast Roran headed out to the fields, hoping Eragon wouldn't sleep in.

* * *

Eragon awoke with a smile on his face.

He stretched and sighed, turning over to find an empty space where his cousin once slept beside him. They had both fallen asleep after the night of passion, so Eragon figured Roran had awoken early to make sure they weren't caught.

He was a little disappointed though, he had wanted to wake up in his cousin's arms. He pressed his face against the pillow next to him and could smell Roran's scent as if he were still there. The side of the bed Roran had slept in was still warm, so he curled up, breathing in deeply.

He heard talking in the kitchen, and smelled food being prepared.

'_Shit! I have to get up!'_ he thought as he shot up. He quickly washed up, almost not wanting to wash off the events of last night, but he knew that Garrow would ask questions if he caught the scent. He put on some fresh clothes and wandered into the kitchen.

"Good, I was wondering if you would sleep in too late. Roran just left to the fields, so eat breakfast quickly and then join him." Garrow told him brusquely.

"Yes father." Eragon answered. He was accustomed to calling Garrow his father, and Roran his brother, since they were closer than an uncle and cousin.

Garrow nodded and then looked at him for a moment.

Eragon had to keep his face from telling his anxiety. Did he know?

"How does it feel to be a man, Eragon?" the older man asked.

He sighed mentally in relief. "Um, pretty good." He replied.

"You know, you should look into taking a lass. You cannot stay forever in my household. Roran will be leaving soon, whether for work or to build a house of his own with a wife."

'_Oh, so it's this conversation is it?'_ Eragon thought. Now he had mixed emotions. Should he be relieved that Garrow didn't know of his son and nephew's relationship? Should he be sad that Roran was leaving, and would find a wife soon? Should he be excited about finding his own wife?

For some reason, a deep sadness overtook him. Maybe he felt more for his cousin than mere lust. Maybe he would never look at a woman and see what he saw when he looked at Roran. If that were the case, what would he do?

If only they could be together without causing a scandal. If only they didn't have to sneak around and hide their feelings when others were around. If only they could wake up in each other's arms.

"Eragon? Are you not fully awake yet?" Garrow asked.

"Oh, sorry, I guess not. I understand." Eragon said quickly. Garrow nodded and said nothing more.

Eragon finished his breakfast and then headed out to the field. He wondered what the day would be like now. Would the two act the same towards each other?

After all, he _did_ lose his virginity last night.

Eragon spotted Roran a ways off and headed over.

"We shouldn't goof off too much today. We have a lot of work to do. Why don't you start on the other side so when we finish we meet in the middle, that way we'll get more done." Roran said the moment he saw him.

"Oh, okay." Eragon replied, a bit disappointed.

Roran glanced at him but said nothing. He watched as Eragon walked to the other side of the field.

He didn't want them to work together today. It was too hard for him. He had realized that since they were both men now, they could no longer continue in their forbidden love. He was going to marry Katrina, and Eragon would find a woman to call his wife as well. Thus, they needed to end it. If they held onto their feelings of reach other, they risked a greater chance of being caught and starting a ruckus. They both had to realize that the fun and games were over, now it was time to accept responsibility and go out into the real world.

So Roran planned to go to Sloan later in the day, when the work was over, and ask for his daughter's hand in marriage.

Eragon sighed as he started to work. He thought things would be different. Not exactly romantic, but at least _something_. He wasn't sure why Roran was acting so distant and didn't crack a few jokes or do something playful like usual.

Did he regret last night? Was that the last time?

He looked over at Roran but couldn't tell what he was thinking. _'Maybe I should look for a woman then. Maybe this is the end. It was all just an experiment anyway, just a way to get out some tension. There has to be someone in Carvahall besides my cousin that will make me feel happy.'_ He thought.

They worked hard and long in the fields, and soon sweat was dripping from their skin as the sun rose to its highest point in the sky. They didn't stop for lunch yet, and were halfway to each other when the sun started its descent.

"We should take a break!" Roran called to Eragon.

The man simply nodded, panting and breathing heavily from the work. They went back to the house and gobbled up some food quickly, enjoying the small rest.

They said nothing as they went back out into the field and finished up the work for the day.

The sun was setting by the time they were done, and while Eragon slowly made his way back to the house, Roran seemed to be in a rush.

"What's the hurry? We're done now."

"I have other things to do today, Eragon." His cousin replied.

"Like what?" he asked with a confused look.

"I'll let you know later, I need to hurry though." Roran replied and sped up as they neared the house.

Eragon was left confused, he had no idea what could be so important that Roran couldn't just rest for a moment. Was it more chores? Was he forgetting something?

When he entered Roran was already beginning to wash up. Normally they didn't really care unless they were extremely filthy. Was he going somewhere tonight?

Eragon froze. _'Oh. Now I get it.'_ He thought.

He and Garrow exchanged a knowing look and then Eragon ate dinner.

After a moment Roran came rushing out in a nice outfit. He nodded to Garrow who put a hand on his shoulder and then was off.

Eragon had a bad feeling, but he didn't share it.

* * *

Later on that night, Roran came back. Garrow was out doing something work related, and Eragon was the only one at the house. He was waiting up for his cousin to see how everything went, and knew the moment he saw him that they didn't go well.

Roran was kicking the dirt and cursing, pacing back and forth along the road. Eragon came out but said nothing. Roran was angry.

"He said no. The bastard said no! Why can't he get his head out of his ass and realize that I'm the best one for his daughter? He's too damned picky, nobody is good enough. If he keeps it up she'll never marry!" he was shouting.

"Maybe after a while he'll come around?" Eragon asked, although regretted speaking. He knew better than to say anything when Roran was angry.

"Tch, I doubt it. No what the hell am I going to do?" he ranted and then pointed at Eragon with a glare. "Don't you dare tell Garrow. If he finds out I was turned down I'll never hear the end of it."

"Then…what will you tell him? You know he'll ask." Eragon couldn't help saying.

"I'll tell him Sloan is thinking about it, since technically it' only a matter of time before the sod gives in and accepts. Still, it irks me how much he hates this family." Roran growled.

Eragon nodded and turned to go back inside.

"Wait, is he even here?" Roran asked, putting a hand on Eragon's shoulder to stop him.

"No, he's off-," he was cut off by Roran's kiss. It was hard and full of anger.

This didn't bode well.

"Good, I need to vent, Eragon, and this is the only way I can do that without destroying something vital." Roran said and gave him a look.

Eragon was uneasy but nodded. Better him than a tool or the field.

This time hurt. It was even more painful than last night, his first time. He knew Roran was being gentle, but didn't realize just _how_ gentle until he felt how rough it could get. He didn't have the heart to tell him to stop, and mused that maybe this would bring them closer instead of farther apart.

If Sloan kept refusing to give Katrina over to Roran, maybe they could finally be together, he and Eragon. He knew it was unlikely, but he could still hope.

He fought against screaming, even though Garrow wasn't there the whole village could still hear his screams. Besides, Garrow could return any time. They had to keep quiet. This morning was already a close call.

They were both panting in the end, and Eragon noticed he was bleeding. He tried not to let Roran know, but when the older man got up he saw the blood.

"Oh, Eragon, I'm sorry." He whispered.

"It's alright." Eragon said and got up, wincing.

"Here, let me take care of it." Roran replied and carried him into the washroom. There were some bruises and cuts that he mended and after soaking in hot water for a while the bleeding stopped.

"You should have told me to stop. I didn't mean to hurt you, I was just so angry." Roran said, still angry it seemed.

"No, it's fine. You needed to calm down some anyway, or Garrow would never believe Sloan was 'thinking about it'." Eragon answered.

"Garrow! Shit, will you be able to hide this?" he asked.

"Well we can always say we wrestled. In your anger you slipped up and kicked me a little too hard or something." Eragon replied and shrugged.

Roran looked at him warily but nodded. "I'm going to check if he's back yet. You should get dressed."

Eragon nodded and slowly got out of the tub they used to wash in and pulled on some clothes, making sure he wasn't bleeding still or anywhere else.

"Ah, there you are, when did you get back?" Garrow asked when Roran walked into the kitchen.

"Oh, not too long ago, did you just return as well father?" Roran asked.

"Yes, so, how did it go?"

"Sloan is…thinking about it."

Garrow nodded, seeing the solemn look on Roran's face. He knew Sloan had refused, or at least wasn't thinking too much of Roran marrying Katrina.

"That's alright, you can try again or pursue someone else."

"I don't want to pursue anyone else father. You know that."

There was silence as Eragon slowly walked in.

"What's wrong with you? Roran, did you two get in a fight when you returned?" Garrow asked as he observed Eragon limping a little.

Roran ducked his head. "We were only wrestling, father." He replied quietly.

Garrow took Eragon's arm and examined some of the bruises. The men held their breath.

"When you're angry, you tend to overdo things. Try to be more careful next time." Garrow said with a hard look.

"Yes father."

Eragon gave him a sheepish look when Garrow had turned around, to which Roran half-glared at.

For now, their secret was safe.

* * *

**Author's Note: Sorry for the long delay, I was hoping to make this a long chappy to make up for it being so late. Gimme some reviews and things might go fasterrrr (sings). Tell me what you think, the good, the bad, and the flaming flames for my fireplace (actually I don't have a fireplace but I can still pretend!). Questions, comments, even ideas are welcome! This looks like it will only have a few more chapters, so if you want to say anything, say it now before time runs out! Unless I take another couple of months in between each chapter, then feel free to take your time (lol). But I'll try to whip 'em out sooner, so until then, Peace Out!**


	3. Chapter 3: True Colors

**Chapter 3: True Colors**

**Disclaimer:**** I don't own anything of the Inheritance Cycle, but the plot of this particular fanfiction came from my own mind. The timeline may be a bit…off-track, because it's been a while since I read Eragon and right now the book is packed away sooo…bear with me please.**

**WARNING:**** There is boyxboy action in this fic, meaning some smut (sex). It is rated mature for a reason. There are mentions of incest and homosexuality, so if you are offended by either of these, I suggest you quit reading. I will accept no flames about this. Read at your own discretion.**

* * *

The next couple of days passed by quickly, but to Eragon they seemed to drag on endlessly. Roran avoided him and was still miffed that Sloan was being such a prick about his daughter, so no more acts of passion crossed between them. Eragon soon began to realize that this truly was the end, that he and his cousin were destined to walk different paths, away from each other.

Yet why did it feel like something had died between them instead of just faded away?

He tried to be positive, he tried not to let it get him down, and he tried to hide the disappointment and sadness that overtook him, but he could still smell Roran on his pillow, and his bruises were still there as a reminder of what transpired the other night, taunting him. He was no longer sore, but he had a desire within him, a thirst that could not be quenched, and he knew it was because of Roran.

He was actually falling in love with his cousin.

He knew this wasn't supposed to happen, not now, not when things were coming to an end. There was no way he could be feeling this way, it was too disastrous! He had to let it go, he had to move on, because his cousin was. Roran was set on marrying Katrina, and what Roran wanted, Roran got. Eragon had no intention of getting in the way or screwing things up just because he couldn't get over that damned night when he lost his virginity.

So having dreams about it were _not_ helping.

Nor were the glimpses he caught of his cousin half-dressed.

Or the memories of their forbidden experiments.

And definitely not the heartbeat that sped up every time he heard Roran speak or looked into his eyes.

Damn feelings, they were going to get Eragon in trouble one day, he just knew it!

* * *

Roran tried his best to stay away from Eragon. He knew that with everything going on, being around the young man would _not_ help. He could tell his cousin was upset, he knew Eragon wasn't happy about their lack of joking and playing around, despite how embarrassed he got because of it.

But there were just some things that the boy could never know, and that should just be left alone in the cage of his heart. It was best to get as far away from Eragon emotionally before he had to leave physically. They had to distance their feelings for each other, or they would never survive without each other.

So he avoided and ignored him, going about his work and focusing on how he would get Katrina from Sloan. His anger at the man continued to be fueled, so that he didn't feel as bad about neglecting his cousin, nor did he have as many regrets.

But still he could feel an ache in his chest every time he thought of Eragon. Each day seemed like one step closer to his eventual leave-taking of the house. He found himself reminiscing about the past and getting nostalgic over the silliest things. He didn't understand why this was happening; he wasn't leaving just yet. He has some options, but hasn't made a decision concerning them, so why did it feel like he was already gone?

Not to mention even though he was preparing himself for the heartache that would overtake him once he left Eragon behind, he knew it would not be enough, and that he would miss his cousin deeply…

…because he loved Eragon.

'_What a mess.'_ He thought to himself. How could he allow himself to fall for his cousin when he was pursuing Katrina? Why did he let his emotions get the better of him and overrule his logic? This was all his fault in the first place for toying with Eragon instead of just sucking it up and dealing with the pain of loneliness. He felt weak and pathetic, not only because of his forbidden feelings, but because he had no hopes of getting Katrina while thoughts of Eragon still plagued his mind.

So now he had to figure out how to handle this, before things get out of control or it become too late. He had to get rid of or over these feelings for Eragon before he could convince Sloan that he was the right one for his daughter.

He only hoped it would be easy, and that Eragon did not feel the same. If he did, things would be even more complicated than they already are, and they may never be able to resolve the issue.

* * *

This was getting to be too much to handle. Roran was definitely avoiding him; he wouldn't even look at him! There had to be a way for them to solve this, once and for all, before Eragon goes insane.

He was determined that the two would just have to have a talk, but was a bit afraid of initiating the conversation. What would Roran do or say? Would he just continue to ignore him? Was this the solution he thought was best? He wouldn't know until he tried, so he made up his mind to corner Roran and make them talk about the Urgal in the room tonight.

He just had to make sure Roran didn't find out about the other secret Eragon was hiding…

Which was another matter, keeping one secret is hard enough, but keeping two is overwhelming. He needed to get one or the other off his chest, before he lost all form of sanity.

Garrow, of course, would still have to be left in the dark in regards to both matters, but Eragon was getting better at hiding secrets from his uncle, so he didn't fret as much about hiding things. It was Roran who would be able to see right through him anyway, if he hadn't already.

So when the time came and Garrow had left to go into town, leaving the two at the house, he took a deep breath and caught hold of his cousin.

"We need to talk."

Roran gave him an annoyed look that soon changed to slightly impressed. He turned to Eragon and raised his eyebrows, waiting.

"Uh…" this wasn't what he expected, so it took Eragon a moment to coherently form a thought.

"Well, well, it seems you've grown up after all. If only a little." Roran said in the silence.

"Look, we need to figure out what to do with…us…with this relationship…" Eragon started, unsure of how exactly to phrase what he wanted to say.

"You mean our experiments? They were just that, Eragon, and nothing more. It's over now. We're both men and we both need to tend to business, so no more games and fooling around." Roran replied sternly.

"But…it just seems so…abrupt!" Eragon exclaimed. So he was right, Roran was purposefully ignoring him as his way of ending the discussion as far as their "relationship" went, or whatever it was they shared. For some reason, that didn't settle right with Eragon. He wanted more, he wanted something tangible. He wanted Roran to love him back.

His cousin sighed. "We cannot continue to hide this secret, so we must end it. Grow up and realize that you cannot always get what you want, Eragon. Right now you're still acting like a child. Let go and move on."

Roran turned to walk away, unable to bear the expression on Eragon's face. He knew he was being too hard on him, but it was the only way he could deal with his own pain he felt and could see reflected in Eragon's eyes.

"So what if you don't get Katrina? What happens then? Will you just come running to me? Am I supposed to be okay with that?" Eragon blurted. He regretted the words but was emboldened by his anger and mixed emotions, so didn't back down or try to take them back.

Roran stopped and didn't know exactly what to think for a moment, and then he turned back to Eragon who looked worried but determined. "If I don't get Katrina, I will find someone else. I've been offered a job in the neighboring town, and if Sloan will not allow Katrina to come with me, then I will find a woman there who has a more accepting father." He replied calmly, despite the boiling emotions within him. It was getting hard for him to keep himself in check around Eragon, and knew his cousin wasn't finished just yet.

"But what about me? What am I supposed to do?" Eragon burst.

Roran looked like he was getting angry now, but Eragon ignored that fact and was being fueled by his new anger. He finally realized what was bothering him in the first place.

He felt left behind, like a toy that a child discarded and never picked up again. He felt hurt because Roran refused to return his feelings, ashamed he had these feelings in the first place, and saddened by the fact that he was unloved. He was unable to move on, and could feel the distance between himself and his cousin growing each day. He was angry that he could not catch up, that he could do nothing to close that distance or make it hurt any less. And he hated Roran for being able to do this calmly, no emotions attached.

Before his cousin could infuriate him more with his words, he let go of one of the secrets he held bottled inside of him tightly, almost unconsciously aware of the effects it would have, or that he was actually saying it in the first place.

"Roran, I love you, and if you leave I won't have anything to hold onto!" he stopped himself short when he saw the expression on Roran's face change yet again and realized what he had just revealed. He gasped and took a few steps back, stammering on a way to take the words back.

Roran was shocked. This couldn't be happening. There had to be another explanation for Eragon's anger. His cousin didn't just say what he thought he said, because there was no way Eragon could feel that way, there was no way that things could get worse.

"I mean…y-you can't just brush this off…it…you can't just…toss me aside like a…a toy or something." Eragon tried to fix his mistake, but it was no use. His anger was gone, and he had just ruined the best thing he ever had. Roran was disgusted and appalled at his feelings, he could tell by the shock he saw on his face. He would tell Garrow, or would never come near him again. He would leave for sure, all because of Eragon and his stupid little feelings.

It had to be true. That look on Eragon's face was forlorn, because he knew he just revealed something he didn't mean to. He couldn't believe it. Eragon loved him. It was almost too much, how could this possibly happen? It was bad enough that Roran had these feelings, but since Eragon did indeed return them…what would they do now? How could they move on after this?

Could Roran deny his own feelings for Eragon in order to do what was right, what was necessary for both of them? Was he strong enough to be a cold-hearted bastard and leave Eragon to moil in his forbidden love? He knew he had to, he knew he couldn't tell Eragon the truth, that he felt the same way, or else the younger man would have hope of them being together, which of course could never happen. And how could they continue to hide this from Garrow after knowing the truth? He knew the power of love, he knew what it could make a person do, and he was not willing to let himself give up everything just for a vain chance of being with Eragon.

"Eragon…" he had to take another breath to steady himself, to get ready for what he had to say. But before he could continue, Eragon stopped him yet again.

"Don't. I know you must feel revolted by what I just said. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it. I shouldn't have said it. I wasn't thinking straight. I'll leave you alone, and I hope you don't hate me." He muttered and turned to leave.

Before he could stop himself, Roran grabbed Eragon's arm. "Wait!"

Eragon gave him a defeated look, not meeting his eyes, an ashamed expression on his features.

Roran wasn't sure what to do or say next. He wanted to comfort his cousin, but he knew he couldn't allow himself to admit his own feelings. This was going all wrong; soon there would be no way to fix the mess they were in.

"Look, you need to understand that this can't go on, Eragon. There's no way it could work out between us. We…we need to just go our separate ways. I know I shouldn't have started this, but now I'm finishing it, and I'm sorry you're going through this. Just let go of whatever feelings you have for me so you can have some peace."

Eragon nodded glumly and didn't seem to register what Roran was saying. He started getting desperate. He took hold of Eragon by both shoulders and shook him.

"Are you listening to me? You can't feel that way for me, Eragon! We're already in a mess, we can't make things worse! We can't love each other, okay!" he shouted.

Eragon's eyes widened and he looked surprised, almost frightened. Roran could see the wheels spinning in his mind as he digested what he just let loose. He regretted losing his control, he should've stayed calm, he should've just left! Why did he have to blurt that out? Why did Eragon have to love him?

Why did Roran have to love him back?

"You…what did you say?" he whispered, barely able to breathe. He was staring into Roran's eyes, searching for the truth, denying what he saw there. Was he dreaming, or did Roran just reveal what he thought he just revealed? While he didn't literally say it, Eragon thought his cousin meant that he loved him too. Maybe he was interpreting it wrong, but the look on Roran's face now told him that he was on the right track.

Roran managed to compose himself, but he knew Eragon saw something. "Eragon, just believe me when I say that if you keep harboring those feelings it will get you nowhere. You have to move on and get over me, alright? We were just playing games because we were children, but now we are adults and must stop."

"But…you just…"

"Just nothing. This has to end, and end now, or else people will find out. Go out and find a lass to court and grant you babies. Build yourself a home and tend to your own farm. That is the way of things now, Eragon. Just as I am courting Katrina and moving on with my life, so should you, do you understand?"

Eragon tried protesting again but no words came out of his open mouth. He simply nodded but still looked at Roran with curiosity. A small glimmer of hope was fluttering in his chest, but he didn't want to test the waters just yet. He wanted to treasure this hope before it was destroyed.

They stood there for a long, awkward moment in silence. Roran wanted to leave but was unsure of what Eragon would do next, and if he truly understood the positions they were in. Eragon didn't want to see Roran go, and also wanted to know whether Roran truly felt the same way, but was afraid of pushing his cousin even farther away. So they were at a crosshairs, barely daring to breathe, their emotions teetering at the surface.

* * *

Eventually Garrow came back and the men resumed their regular day-to-day lives as time slowly began to move on. Eragon still felt frozen in that spot where time seemed to take a pause, wondering how his cousin felt for him, and wondering how his revelation affected him as well. Was Roran truly disturbed because of his feelings, or relieved? Did he really feel the same, or was it just his way of taking control of the situation in order to calm Eragon down? Would he ever find these answers, or would he go on the rest of his life never knowing what was really going through Roran's mind?

Roran tried his best to shove his feelings far away from him. He let Eragon have a glimpse of the turmoil inside and could never let that happen again. He had to lock his feelings up and throw away the key for good and ever. He had to focus on Katrina and making himself look worthy in Sloan's eyes, and by doing so it was easier to forget about Eragon and his feelings, even though they lived in the same house and saw each other every day.

He knew Eragon wouldn't let it go for long, he knew the younger man was curious about what Roran had said. Thankfully he remained quiet about the issue, and didn't even bring it up again when Roran announced that he was accepting the job. He had not yet won Sloan over, but he figured that if he proved successful at this job then he would be more likely to give up and allow Katrina to marry him. The two had gotten very close, which also helped him get over his own feelings for Eragon, although they were still buried deep inside his heart. He hoped nothing more would come between them and that they could all settle down and live normal lives.

It was the day before Roran was to leave, and he expected Eragon to do what he was doing now.

"I just…need to know. It wouldn't change anything; I realize what we both have to do now, but still…" Eragon was saying.

Roran sighed, and since he was in a good mood, overjoyed really, he confided in him. He put a hand on his shoulder and smiled. "You certainly have matured and grown. I'm not worried about you anymore, so I feel safe in telling you this. It wasn't just lust I felt for you. I realized I was falling for you just as you must have realized you were falling for me. Now that we both have clear heads about the matter, yes, it's true. I didn't mean to give it away like I did, just like you didn't mean to blurt it out, but all the same, I love you Eragon. There's nothing more to do about it now, however, so don't think too much on it. I'm going off with this new opportunity, and I hope Sloan will finally admit I'm good enough. I really do love Katrina, and want to settle down with her and have children with her. I want to build a home for her and take care of her. I want you to find someone that you feel the same way about."

Eragon swallowed and nodded, feeling both ecstatic and sorrowful about the news. Roran reached up and ruffled his hair, a familiar twinkle in his eye, and the two smiled at each other.

"Thanks for telling me, it…means a lot to hear. I promise I'll do the same and good luck, cousin." Eragon managed to choke out.

"And to you, cousin." Roran replied.

The two hugged tightly and held each other for a long moment, letting their hopes thrive and allowing themselves to feel their forbidden love. Then Roran held Eragon out in front of him, gave him a bold once-over for old time's sake, winked, and hopped into his ride.

Eragon hid most of the blush from his cheeks and even winked back as he watched Roran leave. He waved and stood outside until he could no longer see anything in the distance, then trudged inside.

"I know you'll miss your cousin, but maybe soon you'll join him." Garrow told him. Eragon simply nodded. Garrow glanced at him from the corner of his eye for a moment, but Eragon didn't seem to notice.

Later on Eragon told Saphira all that had happened, and she comforted him with soft words. She could feel what he was feeling because of their bond and so understood the situation, but could also view it from a different standpoint and assured him that all was for the best and not to worry. It soothed his sadness somewhat, but those feelings of being a discarded toy still hid inside of him.

Roran contemplated all things on his travels. He felt a great weight lift from him, but also mourning overtook him. He mourned their lost love, but looked forward to new hopes and dreams. He would miss Eragon, and would still harbor the dream of them being together, but knew that dream would remain as thus, and never fully come true. So he took the memories he still had and cherished them.

* * *

What they didn't know, and never will, was what Garrow's eyes held as he glanced at Eragon the day Roran left. He was a silent man, but an intelligent man, a man who could take the hints he saw and piece them together. He had the completed puzzle and knew the answer to the riddle.

The first piece came at the beginning, and slowly but surely he grew to understand what was really going on between his son and nephew. However, he never let them see that he knew, allowing them to keep their secret. But he knew. They were not as cunning as they thought, but then again they were young. Soon they would learn to hide their secrets even from themselves.

He wasn't sure where the roads of life would take them, and he reserved judgment on his knowledge, but he saw what happiness could be. He saw love, and knew his boys had experienced that elusive yet fulfilling emotion. That was all that mattered to him.

He knew, and he resolved that he would take the secret to his grave, as he watched Roran leave and glanced at Eragon from the corner of his eye.

And then, many days later, the Ra'zak came and both their worlds were flipped upside down…

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**-Author's Note: Sorry for the long wait, but here it is! And yes, this is the last chapter for this fic. Next up is the story between Eragon and Murtagh! I haven't started it yet, so don't expect it anytime soon, but hopefully this will whet your appetite for now. Once again, this is the prequel to Family Struggles, so if you have not read that, I suggest you do to get the foreshadowing. Please review and let me know what you think, just no flames please. Once I'm finished with the EragonxMurtagh fic I may be done with this "Struggles" series or do a one-shot with SaphiraxThorn, so let me know if you would be interested in that. Peace out!-**


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